To See the World In Our Eyes

Over the last year I have found making eye contact ever more important. We cannot physically touch, shake hands, even speaking close to one another is potentially damaging. That said we can still stay connected, primarily through eye contact. I have noticed people eyes more and more, particularly while wearing masks. The eyes are revealing more and more and they seem even more vital in keeping us connected. As time goes by I am attempting to pass on loving connection more and more, through my eyes. What they reveal about my own soul and what they reveal about the soul of the world, in the way I look at the people and life all around me. Walking around with fear and or suspicion is no use to anyone and it can itself becoming viral, negativity can spread quickly.

 

They say that our eyes are the windows to our souls; they say that our eyes reveal our personalities. Why you may well ask? Well because they reveals a deep truth about humanity. We can hide so much about ourselves, behind a thousand and one masks, but if you look into someone’s eyes and really pay attention, you will see the soul of the person.

 

How we look at others matters. We can look on people with compassion, or we can give them a “hard look”. Think about it when someone gives us a “hard look”, what do we do? Well often we turn away in fear, or respond in anger or aggression. What if someone looks at us with compassion, how do we respond to this? Well usually we look back with compassion. Well we do unless we have fallen so far down into that pit of nihilistic despair that we respond to love with utter hatred. I’m sure most folk have been there at some point. I know that I have.

 

How we act towards others really matters. But it’s not just about doing what is right; it’s also about the spirit in which each task is conducted. We can appear to be encouraging and loving and doing the right thing, but our eyes may well say otherwise..

 

I often hear people say that they can’t smile at people in public any longer, due to the need to wear masks, but is this true? We think we smile with our mouths, but we do not, we smile with our eyes. When I smile my eyes almost slant shut. Whatever we do, and however we do something, our eyes will reveal the truth of our hearts and people will intuitively pick up on this. They will see it into our eyes. We can see what is going on in some one’s eyes, even from a distance. All you have to do is look with soft eyes, with open eyes.

 

I recently came across a story about the writer Alice Walker. She tells of the moment her young daughter first noticed an imperfection in one of her eyes. She braced herself for a reaction of horror at seeing this stigma that had caused Walker such shame since childhood. Her daughter’s reaction was not what she expected, for her daughter was both amazed and delighted by what she could see with her own eyes. She cried out 'Mommy, there's a world in your eye...Mommy, where did you get that world in your eye?' What her daughter saw taught Walker that it was possible to love even the damaged eye that had caused her so much shame ever since she was a child. I wonder if it is possible for all of us to look into the eyes of one another and see the whole world in their eyes.

 

This is not always easy, especially when looking at the world in which we live and breath and share our being. How do we look at the world, how do we look at one another? Do we narrow our eyes, or do we widen our vision?

 

I know there are times when I look at the world that my vision narrows. It happened again a week last Wednesday as I watched the attack by the mob, inspired by Donald Trump and others, on the Capitol building in Washington. It happened as I heard and witnessed some of the insanity that followed. It happens when I have witnessed other acts of senseless violence inflicted on others or the spreading of hatred of others. I can at times think that I am somehow different from these people. I can fall for the lie that there are two types of people in this world, that I am not like them. The truth is that I too narrow my eyes and experience feelings of hatred and I that this is what fuels that kind of violence, this sense that the other is different from me; I too can experience a sense that I am superior to some people. I believe that everyone of us has the capacity for great love and compassion as well as great violence and that each and everyone of us can fall down a rabbit hole of madness. My goodness I have sadly witnessed this in people ever more this last year. The key is how we view the world and how I see our brothers and sisters. Do we see the whole world in their eyes, or do we see something other? It matters you know, it matters what we see and how we see, everything matters, it really does.

 

A facebook memory by Parker J Palmer came up the other day. It was a reflection on Rumi’s much loved poem “The Guest House”  

“The Guest House”

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

Jalaluddin Rumi, translation by Coleman Barks (The Essential Rumi)

Palmer highlights how the poem reminds him of what it means to be human, as he writes: “I have a lot of characters inside of me, and each has a voice of its own. Some of those characters and voices I like. Some not so much! But I need to listen to all of them—not censoring the ones I don't like—and try to host a life-giving inner conversation.” I agree with him, we have to hear all the voices within ourselves, to recognise them as a part of our humanity and also listen to all the voices out there, even the ones that disturb us greatly. We have to listen to them if we want to bring healing not only to ourselves, but our communities and our world. This does not mean tolerating hatred or allowing abuse at any level, but it does mean listening and looking deeply and seeing the whole world in one another’s eyes. It means not seeing the other as alien, as those causing violence do, or rejecting either ours or another’s humanity. This is hard work, tough work, but if we want to bring healing it is something that we must do. If we do not then we will fan the flames of otherness and rejection and peace and healing cannot begin to happen. It matters how we look at the world, do we narrow our eyes or do we widen our eyes? Do we overcome, or do we lower ourselves and become the worst we can be? It is up to us.

Bill Darlison responded to Parker J Palmer’s post stating “I hope we’re gradually learning the truth of what Walt Whitman said, “ I am large, I contain multitudes”. Or what the gospels tell us, “My name is Legion, for we are many.” Acknowledging and learning to live with our own variety, our own conflcting personalities – and those of others – is a major part of spiritual awareness.”

Thank you Bill, real wisdom here. I need to remember this when I look into my own eyes, the eyes of others and the eyes of the world. There are not two types of people in this world. A little later Bill posted the following quotation by Leo Tolstoy from “Resurrection”.

“One of the most widespread superstitions is that every person has his or her own special definite qualities: that he or she is kind, cruel, wise, stupid, energetic, apathetic, and so on. People are not like that. We may say of a man that he is more often kind and cruel, more often wise than stupid, more often energetic than apathetic, or the reverse, but it would not be true to say of one man that he is kind and wise, and another that he is bad and stupid. And yet we always classify people in this way. And this is false… …Every person bears within him or herself germs of every human quality, but sometimes one quality manifests itself, sometimes another, and the person often becomes unlike him or herself, while still remaining the same person.

 

Like Tolstoy when Whitman says “Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself, (I  am large, I contain multitudes.) he is not only speaking of himself he is speaking of humanity. We are a ball of contradictions and we all possess these contradictions within us all. Like Whitman our world is large and it contains multitudes and yes we all contradict ourselves. We have to look and listen to these contradictions both within ourselves and each other. We need to look and listen, but not with narrow eyes or hearts or ears closed to the world, no we need to be wide and open. Can we look at the world and see it in each others eyes, those windows of the soul? It is not always easy. I know that there are times when my eyes narrow.

It matters how we look at the world, it matters how we look at one another it matters how we look at ourselves. When we look with soft eyes, welcoming eyes, open eyes, we see the world in each others eyes, the whole world with all its contradictions we recognise the sacredness of everything and we contribute to the world. That said if we look with narrow eyes, ones that separate and see the other as different, we begin to reject the world and see that which causes discomfort as the other, then we begin to become a part of the destruction of the world.

It matters how we look at the world, it really does. Let us look with open eyes, with soft eyes. Let us recognise the other in ourselves and ourselves in the other and begin to bring healing to this our wounded world, even in this time of fear, in the midst of the pandemic. Let us recognise the whole world in each others eyes.

Radical Amazement

Every Sunday when I wake and prepare myself for leading worship I never know exactly what I’m letting myself in for, that said I have a better idea than the congregations I serve. As I take my seat in the worship space and quietly prepare myself I often look at those present and wonder what they have brought with themselves; I wonder what has been occurring in their lives, what joys and struggles are presently with them; I wonder what they are expecting from me that morning and if it will help them in anyway. I always hope that when they leave and return to their lives and the world outside of our windows, that they do so enriched in some way. My hope is that in some way a part of us all has been opened up to what it is to be alive and awake and fully human. That in some we have deepened our connection to ourselves, to one another, to life itself and to that eternal spirit that runs through it all, that I name God. It’s a risky business creating and leading worship, although I know it’s an even riskier one entrusting someone each week to lead you in it. I offer thanks and praise each week that people come and join and engage in this risky business with me…I offer thanks and praise that people open their hearts and minds and souls with me.

I’m often amazed by the feelings that life brings. They are always a mixed bag. The blessings and curses of “choosing life”, to paraphrase Moses. I felt some changes towards the end of last week, like something had shifted once again. I had taken a few days off and I suspect that my soul and body had once again re-aligned. Never a comfortable process, but always a beautiful one.

To be alive, to be human really is an amazing thing; to be alive to be here, is an amazing thing. We can go all over the world, we can blast off into space and look at all that is life and explore millions of galaxies and gaze at the wonder of it all and yet still miss the truly amazing thing, that we as people truly exist at all. Now some might call that the eighth wonder, but I say to you that it is the one true wonder and the one from which all other wonder extends from. How often do we stop and sense and truly feel that we are alive. Isn’t it amazing that we exist at all.

I feel like a child again; I feel amazed by it all again; I feel awake once again.

Life amazes me, constantly. Despite all the darkness and destruction that is present, that can overwhelm it all, life and love always seems to find a way through. Like that little shoot that finds its way back to life every spring time, finding its way through all the obstacles in its way, insisting on reaching out beyond and finding life. That amazes me; I find that utterly amazing.

Last week I was chatting away with a friend on facebook messenger when suddenly on my news feed a “Meme” appeared with a beautiful picture and a quote by Abraham Joshua Heschel that read

“Our goal should be to live life in radical amazement. ....get up in the morning and look at the world in a way that takes nothing for granted. Everything is phenomenal; everything is incredible; never treat life casually. To be spiritual is to be amazed.”

Now it’s one of those quotes that I’ve heard before, it does the rounds every now and again, but that day it really struck me. I paused and I listened to the words as they ran through my mind, my heart and my soul…especially the phrases “to be spiritual is to be amazed” and “Our goal should be to live in radical amazement.”

Now what on earth could that mean?

Well before I explore "Radical Amazement"I would like to just briefly tell you a little bit about the author of the quote. Abraham Joshua Heschel was a rabbi and a leading theologian in post war America. He was a contemporary and friend of Rev Dr Martin Luther King Jr and marched arm in arm with him during the civil rights protests in Selma Alabama, which he described as “praying with his legs” . I have a wonderful little book of his titled “I Asked for Wonder” and I have shared extracts from it in worship over the years. He writes beautifully about the nature of God and Man and the religious life. There is something about his writing that touches soul and spirit in a real “earthy” way. It is deeply spiritual and yet firmly grounded in reality. The concept of “Radical Amazement” is a classic example of this.

“Radical Amazement” captures those moments, those deeply human moments when we find ourselves intensely connected to the mystery and the majesty of existence. Now Heschel is not really talking about the big moments here when we mark life’s achievements. Instead what he is speaking of is what he himself describes as “the common and the simple” those small things that reveal “the infinite significance” of existence. In many ways “radical amazement” is about paying attention and looking deeply at the routine moments of our lives and experiencing just how incredible they are. There are parallels to mindfulness here, but I think there is more to it than that, there is a sense of eye popping awe and wonder in looking through radically amazed eyes. It’s about seeing the miracle in existence. How many of us truly recognise and acknowledge just how amazing it is that we exist at all?

“Radical Amazement” is about looking into the familiar with what Rumi called “fresh eyes”, it’s about recognising that even the most routine moments are in actual fact outrageous. Just think about our existence here on this spinning planet rushing through a universe some 13 billion years old, or so they tell us. We are formed from stardust and yet made from flesh that are homes to entire eco-systems and billions of cells that are neatly balanced so as to allows us to exist, that are constantly altering and changing and adjusting to all that we experience. We who are made from stardust are more than merely stardust though, we are made up of complex thoughts, emotions and experiences and there is a spirit within each of us. We are more than merely our biology; we are more than merely thinking meat. It is amazing and marvellous to truly be who we are.

And when we see life through “fresh eyes” all this that we are made from reacts in positive and powerful ways, something we can feel it with real intensity at times. I strongly believe that there are times when our whole make up responds to the whole of the make-up of the universe and that this occurs every time that we see the miracle in existence, in a new way. Sometimes this blows me away. It is amazing that we exist at all; it’s amazing that everything came from the same nothing.

Bang…and here we are in a fabulous place…what are you gunna do here…in this sacred place, in this sacred time, in these are sacred bodies, in these are sacred lives…

“Radical Amazement” is about looking into life with truly open eyes, it is an ethical act and an intentional decision, it is the ultimate spiritual practise and as such it is one that involves great risk. This is because it opens us up to all that is, as it truly is. This requires courage, because to see the beauty also requires us to see the horror too. This may seem too awful for some, but it is the awe that accompanies vulnerability that is required to be awakened to radical amazement.

Victoria Safford in the meditation “Open Eyes” asks us to

“Think of yourself as a prism made of glass, reflecting everything as it is, unable to exists dishonestly – reflecting beauty where there’s beauty, violence where there’s violence, loveliness and unexpected joy where there is joy, violation where there’s violation.”

To see the world with awakened eyes, fresh eyes, open eyes is look into the life in “Radical Amazement”. It is life as it truly is in its awe filled beauty. It is to truly let life in and to fill us to the brim.

Victoria Safford sees this as refraction, taking in all that is life and thus allowing it to transform us so that we can begin again anew. She calls it holy work as once we are transformed by it we can let is shine out of us in the prism of our ordinary daily actions as we live in life.

She says that

“To see clearly is an act of will and conscience. It will make you very vulnerable. It is persistent, holy, world transforming work."

It seems to me that “Radical Amazement” is how to live and breathe our human spirituality. At its essence spirituality is about being amazed it is about cultivating greater openness and deeper awareness of the beauty, blessing and mystery of life. Now to me this is the essence of my chosen Unitarian faith.

Openness is at the core of my understanding of the Unitarian spiritual tradition. At our best we encourage and celebrate the kind of openness and intentionality that enables “Radical Amazement” to be possible. When I lead worship each week my hope is to encourage, to challenge and to inspire those who join with me to not get stuck in a frame work of belief or un-belief but instead to cultivate their own experiences and see deep within them so as to bring meaning into each of our lives and thus to bring about transformation both within each of us and the world in which we interact and have our being.

Yes it’s a risky business we enter into each week, but one worth engaging in.

I’m going to end this little blogspot with a short anecdote from the life of Abraham Joshua Heschel.

Whenever he gave an evening lecture he would begin with the following words.

"Ladies and gentlemen, a great miracle has just occurred!"

As the audience began to stir in puzzlement, the great theologian would elaborate…

"Ladies and gentlemen, a great miracle has just take place...the sun has gone down."

How often in life do we even take the time to pay attention to the wondrous workings of the Sun and the Earth that sustains all life that enables our existence?

Never mind anything else, isn’t this amazing in and of itself?

Let’s open our eyes and look into the magnificent mystery of life. Let us live with “Radical Amazement”. Let us not lose our sense of wonder at the miracle that is sheer being.

For it truly is a risk worth taking.