Boomerang Spirituality: A True Realist Has to be an Idealist

I recently found something unexpected in the small schoolroom at the chapel. There on the windowsill was a boomerang. At the time I had no idea where it had come from and I spent the next week asking everyone I saw there, from a variety of groups, if they knew anything about it. In the end I did discover who it belonged to. It had been left there by someone attending one of the variety of 12 Step Recovery groups who use the small schoolroom throughout the week for meetings. He had brought the boomerang for his sponsor as it seems Bill Wilson, one of the founders of Alcoholics Anonymous, had an obsession with the boomerang. It is regarded as a deeply symbolic implement in a variety of spiritual circles.

I was thinking about the boomerang as I drove to Sue’s the other evening. As I was doing so I looked up and noticed a small flock of Canada Geese flying in their usual V formation. Anyone who knows me will be aware that I have a fascination with Canada Geese. Of all the animals I regard them as my spiritual totem. It was a small group of geese and I thought to myself it seems a bit early for geese to flying to Europe for the winter. I had noticed far more Canada geese in the last few days swimming along the canal while out walking the dogs with Sue.

It took me some time but eventually I made sense of this. The geese that were flying above me were from the one family of geese, the young geese were the gosling of the gaggle who were now fully grown and taking to flight. It is the same with the small groups I had observed on the canal. They were no longer goslings. These geese were not native Canadian Geese, they were born here. Canada geese were first introduced to Britain in the seventeenth century and there are many to be found amongst the waters of the north of England and Scotland. So any that we see before the autumn, have not flown in from Canada, but are Canada Geese that are native to this land.

Now even these native Canada Geese do return to their homes, it’s just that they don’t travel as far as the ones that were born in Canada. They are like the boomerang in that they do in fact come back home, they return. They are deeply symbolic of the spiritual life in that they move in circles rather than in straight lines from A to B.

Now all this brought me back to the boomerang, I came back to my original thoughts. Did you know that modern day competitive Boomerang throwers have a special greeting. They say to each another “Full circles to you.” They are wishing one another that, whatever good they do in the world, that it returns back to them in full, if not more. The saying brings to mind some of the teachings of Jesus, from Luke’s Gospel (Ch 6 v 38) “Give, and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you” Echoed in Paul’s writing (2 Corinthians 9 v 6) “But this I say: He who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully” and “It is more blessed to give than receive”(Acts 20:35). These are principles at the core of 12 step spirituality along with the idea of returning home having come through a great hardship, something else that is shared with the boomerang, isn’t this the “Prodigal Son.” As they say "Keep coming back."

For many years there have been boomerang throwing contests. One of the greats was Barnaby Ruhe, who is best known for his "William Tell Trick". To perform his "William Tell Trick", Barnaby would toss on a cape and cap, attaching an apple to his cap through the use of a wooden peg. He would then throw his knife-like boomerang, slicing the apple in half on top of his own head. An incredible feet don’t you think?

These thoughts on "Boomerang Spirituality" bring to mind a story based partially on an Ancient Greek Mythos, a re-telling of the story of “Echo”, symbolizing what we give off we get back in return.

A man and his son were walking in the forest.
Suddenly the boy trips and feeling a sharp pain he screams, “Ahhhhh.”
Surprised, he hears a voice coming from the mountain, “Ahhhhh!”
Filled with curiosity, he screams:
“Who are you?”,
but the only answer he receives is:
“Who are you?”

This makes him angry, so he screams:
“You are a coward!”,
and the voice answers:
“You are a coward!”

He looks at his father, asking,
“Dad, what is going on?”
“Son,” the man replies, “pay attention!”
Then he screams, “I admire you!”
The voice answers: “I admire you!”

The father shouts, “You are wonderful!”,
and the voice answers:
“You are wonderful!”

The boy is surprised, but still can’t understand what is going on.
Then the father explains,
“People call this ‘ECHO’,
but truly it is ‘LIFE!’ Life always gives you back what you give out!
Life is a mirror of your actions.
If you want more love, give more love!
If you want more kindness, give more kindness!
If you want understanding and respect, give understanding and respect!
If you want people to be patient and respectful to you, give patience and respect!
This rule of nature applies to every aspect of our lives.”

I have found that generally speaking this is true, although not absolutely, or at least not immediately. Generally speaking though I have found that the more love I give out the more it returns back to me.

I live with a genuine love for life and people and take a fairly positive view of most things. I am an idealist and I live in hope for humanity. This is why Universalism speaks to me; it is a hope filled faith. Yes it recognises the despair in life, but it also points to the hope that is rooted in this very despair. We do have choices in life. We can either live in fear or in faith that life has so much to offer us. There are many unanswerable questions re the nature of life and the nature of humanity, why wonderful things happen and why the most dreadful can happen. I am not sure that we will ever find the answers in the whys and wherefores.

I have discovered that meaning always emerges if we live with hope and courage; it does not come in getting bogged down within our individual suffering. By saying “yes to life” in answer to “no’s” fear, we manifest the courage to be, to live. This comes in those simple acts of self giving love; those acts that fill our cup with love as we empty it in service to and for others. Meaning comes as we give from our own cup of suffering in an attempt to help another in their hour of need.

The other morning I was chatting with a guy called Nick. He is a personal trainer at the gym I attend. He was apologizing to me as he had not responded when I said hello to him earlier. He said his mind was elsewhere. He is about to become a father for the first time and was worrying about how best to bring up his child in this world. Nick is originally from Iran and grew up under a repressive theocracy. He talked about not wanting to impose any religion on his son but to let him choose for himself. He knows I am a minister but doesn’t know much about the free tradition I am a part of. I listened and said I think that the key is to bring your son up with morals and respect, a love for life, a love for others and a love for himself. The key is to see the sacredness of life and to love it. We then went about our business with enthusiasm. Its funny but that morning I really pushed myself on the weights, I seemed to find more energy following the conversation. I had received far more than I had given.

The conversation brought to mind my favourite film on YouTube, the grainy old video clip of Viktor Frankl above. In it he says “We have to be idealists, in a way, because then we wind up as the true, the real realists. And so you know who has said this? If we take man as he is, we make him worse, but if we take man as he should be, we make him capable of becoming what he can be. This was Goethe. He said this verbally. Now you will understand: this is the most apt maxim and motto for any psychotherapeutic activity.

So if you don't recognize a young man's will to meaning, man's search for meaning, you make him worse: you make him dull, you make him frustrated. While if you presuppose in this man, there must a spark for meaning. Let's presuppose it and then you will elicit it from him, you will make him capable of becoming what he in principal is capable of becoming.”

I love Viktor Frankl. Of all the great 20th century thinkers he may well be my favourite. I love the twinkle in his eye that is so evident in this clip, as well as his obvious humour. He takes what he does seriously without taking himself too seriously. In this wonderful little clip he makes an argument for the idealist in all of us, as he points to what we are all capable of being, if we could just tap into our God given human potential.

As he says by definition the idealist always overestimates what is possible. Where as a realist will only estimate exactly what is possible and no more. In fact perhaps a realist will ever so slightly underestimate what is possible, just to be on the safe side. Just to ensure that they don’t over estimate things and aim too high. Just to avoid disappointment.

Is this truly realistic though?

Frankl suggest by aiming at a realistic level we always fall short of the mark. By taking a realistic view of people we are setting them up to fall way short of what they are capable of achieving. Where as if we aim high and become idealists about human nature we can lift people up to where they are capable of reaching and thus if they fall short of this mark, they fall to a"true" realistic level. For Frankl a true realist, must be an idealist. To achieve what we are capable of we must overestimate what is possible. To become our true selves we must be optimistic. To achieve what we are capable of achieving we must believe that we are capable of more than we actually are. And by giving out more than we think we are receiving we will receive back far more than we thought was possible. In so doing we will encourage others to do the same.

This is the strange mathematics of giving, classic uncommon sense. By giving out more than we receive; by overestimating what is possible, we encourage others to do the same and thus they will give out more and thus we will receive even more that we give. Love will somehow become multiplied by subtraction. All we have to do is take the risk. This is the beauty of the interconnected life.

Life is echo; life is a boomerang; life is like those Canada Geese. What we give out we get back in abundance, as that strange mathematics of giving begins to multiply by subtraction.

If we want to know love, we need to give out love into this our world, we need to risk our hearts to that love. We need to be true realists by being idealists about ourselves and humanity and life itself. This is not to ignore the darker side of life, far from it. We need to acknowledge what is wrong with the world, without becoming weighed down by it.

The Kin-dom of Love is truly within us and amongst us. It is our task to bring it alive through our lives. It is up to us to raise one another up, to aim as high as we can and become the people we never knew we were capable of becoming.